Day 120: Ring in 2011 and get violated by a Packers fan

Tonight was my first time celebrating the new year from a different time zone than my family, so I bent the space-time continuum and called them from the future to blow the ending of Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve by telling them the ball had dropped.

We decided to spend New Year’s Eve playing games and watching movies at home because we were drained from a full day of flying. We flew from Portland to Seattle, then from Seattle to Chicago.

On the flight from Seattle to Chicago I sat next to a Green Bay Packers fan who must have been flying to Wisconsin to see the Packers play the Bears at Lambeau Field on Sunday.

He must have been in his late fifties and had dyed his gray beard and mustache green in support of his team. As soon as the plane took off he inflated a leopard-print travel pillow, took off his shoes and pulled his Packers hat down over his eyes to sleep. He was a tall man, and as he drifted off he began to take up more and more room. First went the armrest, then he began to infringe on what little leg space I had. He must have had trouble getting comfortable, because his feet were everywhere, at one point resting it on the armrest of the guy in front of him.

I decided to ignore him and try to get some sleep. I too took off my shoes and drifted off, only to be abruptly awoken by the tickling sensation of toes wiggling underneath my left foot.  Once I realized that Stephanie was sitting to my right, and that these toes must have, in fact, belonged to the Cheesehead, I quickly put my shoes back on and spent the rest of the flight looking out the window and hoping the Bears crush the Packers on Sunday.

In the words of the iconic Dick Clark, “[Incoherent muttering… incoherent muttering… more incoherent muttering…] HAPPY NEW YEAR!”