Day 216: Have caffeine turn against me

April 7, 2011 § Leave a comment

What’s red, yellow and orange and tastes like berry-flavored gasoline?

What will simultaneously give you the chills while making your armpits sweat?

The answer is 5-hour Energy, which I decided to try today. I hate energy drinks, and 5-hour Energy’s tongue numbing caffeine potion tasted as expected. At least it was in a smaller bottle than an energy drink.

The label says you’ll feel it in minutes, and boy do they hold on to that promise, as I was nauseous within five. It worked – I definitely had energy – but was put in the frustrating position of feeling sick but being unable to sleep it off. I never actually threw up, but let’s just say after lying on the floor for an hour that I came to know the bathroom ceiling well. It was only later that I saw the warning on the bottle:

Limit caffeine products to avoid nervousness, sleeplessness and occasional rapid heartbeat.

I guess pre-gaming for my 5-hour Energy with a tall mug of coffee was a bad idea.

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